i m really beyond myself these days.
it is like crazy shit.
i am not going anywhere, making any progress, watching videos like phycho
none stop, no food, no breaktime
if i am going to get away from that fucking son of bitch like me.
i let my emotion lead all wat i did.
i know it's wrong. but it is like period.
i just cannot stop it.
perhaps i just like to be crazy sometimes. going out with strangers just like I am an adult.
to run away from those reponsiblities i should have taken.
hide like a coward.
like a piece of stinky shit.

I am far better than this.
I am a star.
I am not supposed to be like this.
What it takes to be called adult is not like this.
Adulthood means maturity, handle things in certain integrity, and laylow and be good and polite to ppl.
Even they are rude.

And this time I really stank coz I broke the hearts of the most important persons in my life, who love me more than themselves.

Kid, u r 22.
Almost 23.
It is not a time to crack down, not a time to lose yourself, not a time to be bad. what ever bad u did, stop here, tonight!
go get urself back, pull it all together. Tomorrow, U R GONNA SHINE!
U have got to behave like a thoughtful and responsible humanbeing.